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Word Gems exploring self-realization, sacred personhood, and full humanity
Soulmate, Myself:
Editor's prefatory comment: Art Garfunkel has a great rendition of “Let’s Fall In Love.” Well, it’s a nice idea, good work if you can get it, but there’s a problem. We can no more command the cupid of true love than the muse of creativity. Their structures are similar. It would be equally fatuous to say, “Let’s come up with a concept,” as “The Wedding Song” has it, “never seen before” and world shattering. And good luck to us with either. We’re talking about true love here, not a brain chemical cocktail, at the call of any beast of the field. The real thing will run us a few dollars extra; the authentic organic version is always more pricey.
weaponizing ‘the fever’ Many years ago, my dear Uncle Joe told me a story of something that happened during his time in the Korean War. The enemy devised a new torture method to induce captured GIs to publicly “confess” that America was to blame for the war. Think of a ring too small for a finger.
The sadistic tormentors would place small tight rings on the penises of their captives. And then they would parade naked Korean peasant girls before them. The male member, autonomically, would inflate, causing much pain, and sometimes profuse bleeding, with bursting blood vessels. Buddy Holly got it right The early rock-n-roller perceived that sexual excitement is not necessarily a big deal. Of and by itself, it means nothing. Hot-to-trot individuals, girls and guys, can “fall in love” ten times a day, when the next dream floats by. autonomic triggering devices Pretty faces, and images of strategic body parts, serve as triggering devices to help Mother Nature perpetuate the species. Every mammal, every beast of the field, experiences the same dynamic. None of this, fundamentally, has anything to do with what we call “love.” It’s just a call of nature.
the ancient Greeks well understood See the discussion on the "preface" page. Dr. Elizabeth Vandiver explains that the goddess Aphrodite to the Greeks was not so much the icon of love but of sexual madness. "The fever" easily makes people go crazy. And if you attempt to build your life around a temporary hormonal impulse, guess what will happen. As they used to say in the old Marvel comics, you get three guesses and the first two don't count. there is no 'fever' with the higher versions of love But this gives an entirely wrong impression. We're not talking about some day-old cola that's lost its fizz. Who'd want that? Here's what we'll find. The famous "madness” -- explored endlessly by poets and philosophers -- applies only to the lower, purely physical, levels of so-called “love"; only to the bio-instinctual responses.
why doesn't crazy love also apply to her godly virtues, not just bodily measurements We’ve never heard of Aphrodite’s insanity imposing itself as a frothing craving for another’s virtue -- her character, competence, selflessness, intelligence, sincerity, excellence, guilelessness, unassuming modesty, wholesomeness, service-mindedness, graciousness, purity and holiness. The unenlightened male might want these qualities in a mate, but not to the point of carpet-fressing associated with chasing a skirt; not too many hit songs on this topic. your best friend 'forever, in blue jeans' But he is missing out. We've just described the true goddess, the real to-die-for dream girl, the multi-faceted font of blessing, the wellspring of every secret wish he's ever had, that is the classic "girl next door" ideal, with her effortless beauty, grace, and unalloyed spirit: never flirtatious, never calculating, never disingenuous, "what you see is what you get" -- you might not always like what she says, but you can count on her to be honest and always on your side -- open-hearted, unguarded, without hidden agenda, perky and playful, a trusted confidante and advisor, your best friend "forever, in blue jeans." As might be suspected, we'll need some time to grow into this array of stellar attributes and with a level of maturity to support them. The real thing, the real love, however, when it blossoms, is 100x, 1000x, more intense and pleasurable than what the mammals ever thought about. The beasts-of-the-field ilk remain unpersuaded. With them, it's all "slam, bam, thank you ma'am," or they're not interested.
a new kind of crazy love The real love is more than potent, but, in its throes, we do not go off-line and lose coherency. In fact, we become more clear-eyed, mental acuity is sharpened, there's an augmentation of consciousness. We feel more alive, more integrated, at the deeper-person level. However, this sense of wholeness and plenitude occurs not in the presence of just any good girl - she has to be that one particular good girl, made just for you. Perceiving the true mate's god-like attributes, aspects of the sacred soul and the true self, will signal that you’ve found something real. Now you have a foundation on which to build the eternal marriage, the ultra-intimate relationship. And don't worry, you don't have to give up "the fever, hotter than a brussel sprout," it'll be new and improved, but it has to be with that one right person, and at the right time -- both of you have to be mature enough to receive this. It's not so easy to fall in love the right way, but it's worth the wait and the preparation. Truth is, there's much better in the offing than "the fever," but we don't know about this right now. "The fever" is but pale shadow, a black-and-white smudged copy, compared to the vibrant and dazzling full-color production of sacred eroticism to come; it's just a bland pencil sketch versus glorious oil on canvas. But few would believe this at the moment. and so, if you ever want to ruin your life real fast… While it's "so easy to fall in love" in a facile way, it’s even easier to scar, maim, and ruin your life in a hot mindless moment. We'd do well to sit down, right now, while we still can, before the madness debilitates and, in our deliria, believe it means something.
In the ancient Greek myth of the beguiling singing Sirens, the ship captain Odysseus had himself strapped and locked-down to prevent, in the madness of love, hurling himself into the sea, drowning, in an attempt to reach the goddesses. “Buckle-up, buttercup” took on new meaning. madness maddened The strapped-down Odysseus becomes a metaphor of the insanities not of love but the urge to procreate. Mother Nature will exact her toll and get her way. In the Greek myth we see the normally thoughtful and rational, even heroic, person now hell-bent to throw himself away. As if in a drunken stupor, Odysseus fights his own person to dive into roiled waters, and near-certain death, for the prospect of satisfying momentary, brain-chemically prompted, bio-cravings. As Herman Melville used the phrase, this is “madness maddened,” indeed. And what chance does one have for lasting happiness if one chooses a mate in this fog-headed delirium? David was overthrown in the moonlight, but later they slept apart, the fever had long departed. When he was old and ill, they brought young girls to his bed, not Bathsheba. not unreservedly thrilled The great thinkers of history warn us. Prepare for the storm during calmer waters. And ponder the reality that few will admit: Why is it that 99+% of all married couples you know, to various degrees, are, at best, not unreservedly thrilled to be together? Many of them thought they were entering a delight that would last for the mortal duration, and maybe all the way to forever. Is forever over already? What happened? - and how could the bubble pop so quickly? You are invited to further discussions.
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