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Word Gems
exploring self-realization, sacred personhood, and full humanity
Soulmate, Myself:
Prometheus Denied
2: Seeds Of Greatness
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Kairissi. Hey, buddy, I’m a little apprehensive about walking through those
giant mahogany doors.
Elenchus. Now just relax, Dear, and remember, no one will be forcing us to do anything. It’s our decision.
K. Well, I just feel a little jittery. I don’t want to be sweet-talked into
anything during a weak moment.
E. C’mon, I don’t think the MLP board is going to give us a sales
pitch.
K. I just want to keep my wits about me. Hold my hand now, soldier-boy,
and let’s get this over with.
E. (sighing)
[he opens the door; they walk through]
Lateece. Kairissi and Elenchus, thank you for coming today. It is a
pleasure to meet you. Your guides, Day Star and Big Water, have spoken
so highly of you.
E. Thank you, madam, but our guides’ comments are sometimes more
generous than real.
K. We appreciate your time [spoken with a measure of reserve].
L. Please, come, sit down and be comfortable. I am Lateece. These are
my colleagues, Senbar and Arcnam. First of all, allow me to say that we
commend your venturesome spirit in meeting with us today. Your path
in eternal life is for you alone to choose. Our part is merely to provide
information as an aide to decision-making.
K. And we are under no obligation to do anything, is that correct?
L. Of course, my child. One of the great prime directives of the Astral
Realms, a sacred decree sent down to us by the Ancient Watchers, is that free will must remain inviolable. No one on this board would attempt to force any decision upon you.
K. Ok, thank you for stating that.
L. The discussions we now commence embrace a vast field of knowledge.
There are many ways to begin. Since we have already touched upon
“obligation” and “free will,” allow me to clarify by adding that free will
is not an absolute; and, while no external authority would ever force
obligation upon you, the maturing soul might discover such sense arising
from another source.
K. What do you mean, Madam Grand Regent?
L. Allow me to restate: no Astral-Realm authority will require anything of
you – but if I may be plain, as your eyes open to your own destiny, you
will come to be harder on your own self than any external task-master.
K. (sighing) It almost sounds like I should be wary of myself; that, I might
obligate myself to something I don’t want to do.
L. Senbar, will you please join the discussion and help this pretty lady?
Senbar. Thank you, Madam Grand Regent. Kairissi, may I offer an analogy that might help us regarding this issue of restricted freedom? You will have noticed in the gardens surrounding this building the many towering cypress trees.
K. Yes, dear sir, their majestic horizontal branches remind me of extended
wings of a giant bird, suggesting a weightlessness, a gossamer abeyance
– so beautiful!
S. Quite beautiful. But isn’t it amazing that these soaring sentinels of
graceful verdure began as mere tiny seeds? And locked within each seed
was a blueprint, so to speak, of all its regal potential.
K. I see that.
S. But here is the important point for us: That tiny seed possessed the
freedom to become a cypress tree only – not a lion, not a rosebush, not
an eagle – only a cypress tree.
K. I think I understand what you’re saying. I have the freedom to become
only what I was meant to be. My freedom comes with a vector and is
not absolute.
S. You were created in the image of Mother-Father God. You are like a
tiny seed in which is embedded an awesome potential. Your freedom,
as a divine soul, will express itself within the parameters of your destiny,
your family heritage – and not something else.
K. I understand.
S. But allow me to press my analogy a little further. What if the newly-germinated cypress seed, as a tender sapling, were trod upon, or
otherwise denied opportunity of unfolding its potential.
K. The young tree would be hurt. It would grow up in a deformed way; or
maybe something worse… So… are you saying that my innate potential
could be thwarted?
S. Let’s put it this way. If no external authority will tell you how to run
your life, where does the locus of responsibility lie? Who will make
decisions concerning how your life will develop?
K. That would be me, I suppose… and I guess you’re probably saying that
my own decisions will either advance or hinder the blossoming of my
sacred potential.
S. What do you think?
K. Ok, I accept your point. It’s just that… I’ve always had the view that
we’re all made in the image of God; and I guess I thought that, eventually,
we’ll all grow up to reach a similar level of maturity and development. Is this not true?
S. Permit me to change analogies. A one-gallon water-bucket is perfect
and complete as it is. It does a good job transporting one gallon of water.
But a five-gallon bucket can do more.
K. mmm… So, each divine soul will eventually, in a sense, perfectly
express the image of God; but… with a different capacity to do so.
S. (smiling)
K. But wait a minute! Maybe I like being a one-gallon bucket. Is that so
wrong? I have a perfect and complete life carrying one-gallon of water.
Why should I trouble myself to manage five gallons? Isn’t there room for
one-gallon buckets in the family of God?
S. Will you be entirely happy on a “one gallon” level of existence, knowing
that you could have been much more?
K. I’ll have to think about that. I just don’t want to feel swept along,
against my will, into going to the Earth for some quixotic notion of
advancement. Maybe some things are just too hard and too dangerous
– and not worth it.
S. Kairissi, there are many who do not go to the Earth, and they would
concur with your last statement.
K. (smiling) One-gallon buckets of the universe unite!
S. And they do. The Astral Realms are subdivided into countless worlds,
each offering various opportunities for experience. The Earth is but one
of the “classrooms.” No one could ever experience it all. You will have
to decide what you want to learn, the level of difficulty, and the specific
areas in which you would like to develop.
K. Vice-Regent, if there are many “classrooms,” many learning situations
to choose from, why would anyone ever choose to go to the troubled
Earth?
S. My dear… why would anyone ever pursue a demanding PhD program?
– why not stay in the cookies-and-naptime environment of kindergarten?
K. Uh-oh! I feel my argument suddenly weakening.
S. Should you not want it to weaken if it does not represent your highest
and best interests?
K. I don’t know what my “highest and best” is right now. I want to know
that I have real options and not just a Hobson’s Choice leading to an
Earth-mission.
S. If it becomes a Hobson’s Choice, it will be one of your own making.
K. I’m not sure what you mean by that, sir, but maybe I should allow this
question to rest for the moment.
L. Dear friends, let us have a twenty-minute break and refresh ourselves.
Kairissi and Elenchus, if you like, please feel free to stroll in the gardens.
(walking amidst the cypress trees and roses)
K. (sighing) Oh, Darling Companion, I am sorry but… I’m feeling afraid.
This isn’t going the way I thought it would. I was imagining a stern
tribunal of partisan judges who would attempt to argue us into accepting
something I didn’t want. But they couldn’t be more reasonable, and –
how strange – the one I’m coming to fear most now is my own self who
might agree to some draconian measure. Oh, Elenchus, the truth is…
I’m just so afraid of losing you! (very softly weeping)
E. Kriss, I'd like you to relax – center yourself! You are not
going to lose me! That's not possible! Our souls are bound together
since our creation, united and sealed by Mother-Father God. We cannot
be separated in any meaningful way. Besides, I cannot live, I cannot
breathe … without you.
K. (sighing) Ok, Ellus… please forgive me… I feel a little better.
E. (smiling) I’ll forgive you for wanting me so.
K. (very softly laughing) That “wanting” was off the record, though – you
have too much negotiating power over me already.
E. (softly laughing) I need to get that last part on tape, too.
K. (softly laughing)
E. Look, Krissi, we won’t be making any quick decisions. And remember,
I will not do anything unless you agree.
K. (sighing) Ok… maybe I just needed to hear you say it one more time…
(abruptly) Oh, look at that beautiful cypress tree! Its arms protruding
like angel-wings! … its head in the clouds … so perfectly formed… so
very perfect…
E. Maybe it’s perfect because, when it was a sapling, it was pruned and
directed to become what we see today…
K. (deeply sighing)
E. Hold my hand, Sweetheart. No matter what happens, no matter what
we decide, you will always be the better part of me, and I will never let
you go… (with a smile) I intend to be with you in whatever “classroom”
we choose … pulling your pigtails, sending you notes, making a nuisance
of myself.
K. (softly laughing through tears) I will complain to teacher!
E. (softly laughing) And what will be the complaint?
K. (softly laughing) That you’re not paying enough attention to me.
(back in session with the MLP)
L. Shall we resume our discussion? Kairissi and Elenchus, does either of
you have a question you’d like addressed right now?
K. Yes, Madam Grand Regent… I don’t understand why many Twins elect
to go to the Earth when other choices are available.
L. You have touched upon a topic which defies short explanation. Over
the coming discussion-sessions, I think the answer will begin to manifest.
But let us chip away at this. Arcnam, please enlighten us.
Arcnam. Thank you, Madam Grand Regent. While the issue is multi-faceted concerning why Twins often accept a tour of Earth-duty, may
I begin by focusing on a core misperception troubling every immature
soul… I speak of the fear of death.
E. Vice-Regent, if I may interrupt – I don’t understand. I know that
mortals fear death, but, in the Astral world, of course, there is no death.
Here, we live on and on, without any threat to our bodies. So, why do
you say, “every immature soul,” as not everyone even goes to the Earth?
A. My friend, listen carefully to my words. I did not say, “the fear of
bodily death.”
E. But what other kind of death is there?
A. There is another, more fundamental, fear of death at work in the
psyche of every immature soul. The fear of bodily death is mere subset,
one manifestation only, of the general rule. Psychologists and spiritual
teachers, both here and on Earth, refer to the power behind this fear as
the small ego or the false self.
E. I am more confused now. The ego, as I see it, is our sense of self.
Surely, there’s nothing wrong with a personal identity.
A. Nothing at all – if it were to develop along the lines of that innate
potential of which we spoke earlier. In fact, a healthy sense of self is vital
to the soul’s unfoldment. But the ego becomes petty and distorted when
it views itself in a “me against them” struggle for existence. That’s why
we call it the “small ego.”
E. I can see that happening on Earth with all of the injustice there, but
why would the ego act that way here in Summerland where there’s
plenty of everything?
A. Why, indeed. To understand this issue, we must seek for wider
perspective. The origin of the ego, and its wayward course, began eons
ago – so long ago, in fact, that its beginnings are shrouded in mystery.
However, our best mystics and philosophers tell us, in that primordial
time, souls, as tiny sparks of divine life, became separated from Mother-
Father God. At that time, each soul was undifferentiated; that is, each
did not enjoy a well-defined sense of self.
E. But why is it so important to be independent? Why can’t we all just
live from the providence of God? Why not simply receive the blessings
of Mother-Father, have faith in that, and live a happy life?
A. Would you then be so happy?
E. I think so… I mean, why wouldn’t I be happy if all blessings were
supplied to me, and I needed nothing?
A. Let’s consider that cypress seed again. It grew into what it was meant
to be. And what are you meant to be, young man?
E. Sir, that answer is above my pay-grade. Please tell me.
A. Well, it’s not so easy to supply a full answer. But, for now, I will respond in negative terms and say that you were not designed just to receive gifts of sustenance, as a caged tiger is fed by its keeper; you were not meant to simply be an order-taking robot, preprogrammed by some higher-up.
E. Not even as high up as Mother-Father God?
A. Especially not with them. May I remind you once more – you were
“made in the image.” What does this mean? It means many things, but
one thing for certain: the mind you were given is godlike in its capacities,
has awesome creative powers, waiting to be developed. You were meant
to reason, to become, to expand, to achieve, to build, to create, to soar!
Do you really believe you were given such high-powered potential simply
to live in serfdom, unthinkingly taking orders?
E. But I wouldn’t want to be insubordinate to Mother-Father God!
A. Son, you misunderstand the nature of your destiny. Yes, of course,
you will ever want to be a loyal son – but what does loyalty mean? Is it
the loyalty of a small child or the loyalty of a mature adult son? Mother-
Father want you to take your place in the divine family as an advanced,
fully-developed scion who is able to make wise decisions, creatively craft
solutions to knotty problems, love others selflessly, even heroically, and
be an inspiration to all.
E. That’s a very lofty view, sir. How does a tiny “spark of God,” one that
doesn’t even have a sense of self, get from here to there?
A. As I said, we do not have a complete answer about this developmental
process. But we can know some things, even by inference. Why did God
allow the separation? Why not just keep all of the infant soul-sparks “at
home in the playpen” and be one happy cozy family? The answer seems
to be this: We are not meant to be tiny babes forever, to be offered
lollypops and patted on the head. That is not our destiny. We are to
become autonomous individuals, majestic and glorious, loyally serving
God from our own centers! That will require our sacred individuation
and a perfected sense of self. And the small ego was meant to be a kind
of nanny in the process, a temporary developmental stage, that would
encourage a perception of independence.
K. How does all this relate to the “fear of death”?
A. The journey toward sacred individuation will be long and perilous,
fraught with pitfalls. True separation from God, and from other souls,
is an illusion, is not possible, as we are all connected at the quantum
level. But, the infant soul misperceives itself as isolated and alone. To
the immature ego, the universe appears to be a forbidding place of “not
having enough,” of shortage, of lacking what it needs; moreover, this
sense of deficit devolves into a more sinister distortion of “not being
enough.”
K. Sir, I think I’m beginning to see. This would be the origin of fear.
A. Quite so. The ego, in its terrors of isolation and famine, becomes
“small” and petty and unwarrantedly fears for its very existence. Though
the soul, in its core essence, is indestructible, the small ego will now
miscast personhood as something vulnerable, as never having enough,
and forever under siege; the summation of which leads it to a sense of
ultimate loss: an existential fear of death – not of mortal body, but of
the ego’s own annihilation.
K. I must admit, I’m feeling a little nervous now. The small ego seems
to be such an insane aspect of the human condition with its selfishness
and greed. I’m tempted to ask, did God make a mistake in allowing its
influence?
A. From one perspective, the small ego appears to be utterly anomalous
to having been “made in the image”!
K. That’s what I was trying to say.
A. But, as we mentioned, the small ego represents a temporary
developmental stage of humanity, roughly analogous to a “rebellious
teen” phase. When we lived in “God’s house,” so to speak, as those
infant-sparks of life, in close union with the Divine Parent, our sense of
individuality was so weak that we lacked an awareness even of ourselves,
or even that of being with God.
K. (sighing) Psychologists tell us that a little baby is not able to
differentiate between itself and its mother. It sounds like we didn’t even
have an ego way back then.
A. Just a latent, undeveloped one – a “proto-ego.” Those “baby sparks”
were not thinking sparks; there was no dialogue-in-the-head for them.
They had no sense of identity, no symbolic self, but lived as internally
anonymous. And in that nameless, selfless condition, they knew neither
good nor evil.
K. There are limits to the benefits of innocence, I guess.
A. Ignorance for them was not bliss – nor anything at all. They were not
yet sentient beings.
K. (sighing)
A. Ancient wisdom-literature, including the Genesis account, provides
mythical presentation of a life in so-called paradise, a purported golden
age of union with God, before the awakening of the ego.
K. It’s sort of like… the “baby sparks” lived in paradise with God. In
metaphoric terms, there was no “fall” in the Garden of Eden but only a
coming of age, an awakening to one’s ability to choose regarding good
and evil.
A. Adam and Eve actually advanced in development when they decided
to eat the fruit.
K. Because at least they were now thinking beings.
A. This is a very important point: Before you can become a good person
you must first become a person! Eviction from the Garden symbolized a
thrusting of the “baby sparks” into a seeming life of separation from God.
This was the start of “the world”; humanity’s egoic struggle to find itself,
the “true self” within. Of course, in that primal developmental stage, the
struggle would be dominated by self-interest. But in that egocentrism,
as precipitate by-product, a clearly-defined sense of self would gather
more and more sentience.
K. (sighing) That self-interest quickly takes on a pathological emphasis,
which, I presume, is the cause of much suffering on Earth.
A. The small ego’s self-seeking is an insanity – sadly, it becomes the origin and locus of evil in the world: It will seek its own to the exclusion of
all others. Everything it encounters will be injected with an element of
“me”; everything is viewed in terms of potential threat or enhancement
to itself.
K. Will we always be burdened with an insane ego?
A. Our greatest thinkers believe that we shall ever retain our sense of
individuality – else, why go through the trouble to develop it? But, as we
spiritually mature, the radical focus on pure self-interest becomes muted.
The beginning of sanity is to witness one’s own egocentrism.
K. So, the fact that I’m troubled about this is actually a sign that I’m
waking up to its influence.
A. Not everyone is thus troubled; not yet. And as we become more aware
of the flow of life within, as we grow more conscious of both the “false”
and the “true” self, we move toward higher levels of being.
K. I have this picture in my head of the “baby sparks” playing with toys
on a carpet in God’s house – but not truly aware of their relationship to
God, or even of their own existence – all of which begs the question:
What good is life without a heightened level of consciousness?
A. Few questions could be more poignant; indeed – What good is life if
one is not sufficiently “alive” to engage it? Our task in this business of
living, it seems to me, is to make our way back to your vision of “God’s
house,” but, this time, to live in conscious union with the Divine Parent.
K. (sighing) That is beautiful, Master Arcnam – “conscious union”! –
and not just unmindful babies crawling around on a carpet. But… this
moment… I’m bothered by the thought that the small ego might be
afflicting me in ways I haven’t discovered.
L. Your comment, dear sister, is honest and forthcoming. But the
nettlesome issue suddenly entering your awareness is relevant to all.
May I suggest that we adjourn for the day and allow time to reflect upon
what we’ve established thus far? With your permission, let us meet here
again tomorrow.
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