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Word Gems exploring self-realization, sacred personhood, and full humanity
Soulmate, Myself:
On “The Wedding Song” Prologue page, there are a great many testimonies from the other side concerning the Twin Soul marriage. the prosecuting attorney for authentic marriage, Spirit Guide Margaret Margaret speaks eloquently and forcibly in support of women trapped in loveless shell-marriages. However, she, along with other teachers, also informs us that we, all of us, “cannot be perfected” without the true love and marriage. Can we see the paradox? How can we receive the perfection that comes only when two enter authentic marriage if we have to be perfect and good enough, like the fairytale prince and princess, to even begin the process? When I saw this, I knew that my old view was seriously wrong. catch-22 It reminded me of my early Christian fundamentalist days with some of the ministers back then saying that people had to overcome various personal sins, had to "be good enough," in order to be baptized, receive the holy spirit, and enter the church. Yet, at the same time, they preached that we needed the holy spirit and church membership to achieve perfection! - a catch-22. I had fallen into the same kind of contradictory reasoning of earlier years. It was the wrong argument then, and the wrong argument now. Editor’s note: There is no such thing as “receiving the holy spirit by baptism.” We already have a factory-installed permanent link to God via internal soul-energies. But this issue is well explored elsewhere on WG. minimum threshold-level of maturity and you’re good to go now Granted, the eternal marriage is not for the immature, not for children, not for the utterly ego-led. Absolutely not. But it’s finally apparent to me that a minimum threshold-level of maturity is enough to begin, and now you’re good to go. Ancient Spirit Guides tell us that they too are not perfect, not infallible, and make mistakes at times. And if two are authentically in love – meaning, they have a real, live underling once-in-a-lifetime soul bond – then they do not need to wait until they could be so solidly mature as to never be annoyed, or ruffled, or miffed, or irritated, or need to count to ten. If this were to be the standard, then no one could ever get married.
Reader's comment: "It’s not like the typical relationship where each blames the other. (I knew that for years.) Instead, I am driven to make myself the best I can for him because I would NEVER want to hurt him in any way, even in the way of simple annoyance. It’s a completely different way of developing, and truly the only way that’s ever been successful in any meaningful, lasting, way for me." Editor’s note: This comment is important as it demonstrates how Twins are motivated to improve, each for the other, and illustrates why perfection is not needed to get married.
I wanna wake you from your deepest sleep Can we speed up the rate of spiritual development? Once it begans, it seems that we can augment the process. But if it hasn't begun, there's nothing we can do to initiate, even for ourselves, as the soul has its own timetable for awakening. Nothing external -- including the surface personality -- can reach or move the soul, as it's linked to God, and good luck to us applying leverage to make God do something if the timing is wrong. Anne Murray, What Would It Take
What is this minimum threshold-level of maturity? I can’t tell you exactly, but, at the right time, you and your mate will need to enter what we’ve called a “joint meditation” to discover what this means. Let’s be frank and issue some caveats. There is no marriage-police in Summerland. No one will stop two who want to live together. However, if they come together without being ready, they will create suffering for themselves, and might have to separate again, thereby delaying a proper commencement, possibly, for a many years. We don’t want that. But also we don’t want to play super-righteous and think that we could never have an ill-thought in marriage. My view is this: If two have prayerfully explored their own egos, hearts, and minds, along with receiving wise counsel from the ancients; and if they know, within their deepest persons that this is what they truly want – that is, to face life, and eternal life, together, just the two of them, together, whatever comes, to the exclusion of all others – and this, despite any minor shortcomings concerning character development which might occasionally beset; further, to state this differently: if a couple has reached a substantial "union of spirits," a palpable meeting of the minds (as discussed in the "constructive assent" writing); if they're well in agreement concerning life goals, life direction, life meaning; if they have no wish to entertain private hobbies, endeavors, or any project, or any relationship, to the exclusion of the other mate - no need for extracurriculars because the relationship isn't "enough" for them; if what they want, as priority one, is simply to be together, just to be one and have each other, to do all things together, with never a thought of any solo agenda; then, they should, at minimum, begin to jointly enter into the activities of daily life; and, with success here, very soon, they should be officially married, and grow into the spiritual perfection that comes only within the sacred authentic marital union. Special note: Some of this talk about no side projects, exclusivity, without need for private agenda, might sound frightening to John and Mary. They’re troubled because their union leaves much to be desired. They often don't want to go home and look for other activities just to escape from the marriage. If one were to feel this way, then -- memo to self -- be assured that one has not yet entered the true relationship. The authentic love and marriage longs for an endless perpetuity of intimate union, with no desire for solo side projects or private agenda. This would never even enter the minds of the true couple. Neither of them would ever want to do anything -- it would be hurtful to their own spirits -- to indicate or even subtly suggest that "you are not enough for me". trust In several of the writings, the issue of trust has been discussed. Images of the past might bedevil two for some time. But, again, the joint-meditation will reveal if the old offense was merely a product of the disastrous Earth-trip and its unique pressures, or something systemic needing to be addressed before marriage. I will say this, however, my views here, too, have been upended. I’m not saying that trust isn’t important, because it remains the bedrock of any love relationship. But when egos begin to harshly judge the sins of the past, a kangaroo-court verdict might ensue. Here’s what I began to see concerning trust. I thought about incidents in my own life, from an earlier time, when I did things, when my conduct did not reflect my true self. In the heat of the moment, I found myself doing things quite contrary to everything I’d always said I’d never do. Today, I wince at the very thought of old infractions, and feel deeply chagrined, sometimes to the point of great despair. But I’ve come to see that situations like these are not cause for self-condemnation, and not so unusual. I would suspect, that many, maybe all, human beings have certain memories that are never talked about. It’s part of the human condition, and part of the universal probative experience that is the classroom of planet Earth. And it’s really good for one thing: if one’s spirit is open to receive correction, we will find that forgiveness can come more readily now. We no longer think in super-righteous, condemning terms, such as, “How could you have done that, I would never have done that!” This is the hubristic self-deception, the profound delusion, of the Pharisee in Jesus’ parable who chanted, “I thank thee Lord that I am not like other men.” Yes, “not like those others” -- spoken with curled lip and judgmental spirit. debt, with accrued interest, fully paid, to the last penny And so, when two prepare for marriage, and the issue of trust comes up, in the context of what happened at an earlier time, it’s good to see if lessons have been learned. They probably have. What happened in the past, as an expression of immature adventurism, but now fully paid for by years of sorrow and regret, should not be held over the head of another, self-righteously framed as a “trust” issue. If the infraction has been processed, and meditated upon, for a long time, then there might very well be great maturity now as a result, and great wisdom. These are the preparations for marriage not found in a handbook, ones that we didn’t plan on, and might wish we could undo; however, we are glad for the consequent very deep understanding, that sin causes suffering and misery; it's not just a theory anymore, not a trite platitude in a book; but now precipitating a steeled resolve, a resultant self-knowledge, that one would never return to anything like that again. Prime Minister Sir Winston Churchill: “The Americans can be trusted to do the right thing – after trying everything else first.” here is the person who is ready for marriage This is the kind of person you would want to marry and is ready for marriage. Absolutely. She can be trusted now; eternally. As an afterlife entity expressed it, by her mere presence “a sense of home and complete rest had filled my soul.” However, she labors under no illusions. She has great self-knowledge, and she will tell you that she has earned no medals, deserves no merit badges. She knows both the good and the bad, deep within, and, with this empathetic foundation, would no longer condemn anyone for anything. This magnanimous and beneficent mind was forged in the fiery crucible of personal suffering, as she agonized and convulsively wept her way... back into the light... and back to you. As the book of Proverbs puts it, "his heart safely rests in her." Almost any girl, especially when she’s young, can offer animal-based thrill. No big deal, you can get that anywhere. But, note this well. There is only one girl, in the whole universe, to offer one particular guy, a sense of “coming home” and “complete rest to the soul.” This will run you a few dollars more. And, when you find that one particular girl who offers these elevated levels of consciousness, be advised that one has now met the sacred beloved, one’s eternal Twin Soul. She is the one you are meant to marry – at the right time.
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